Ahhh the Gold Coast. Where sporting careers go to die.
Despite many attempts across various codes, there has yet to be a successful sporting club in the party capital of our great island nation.
Although I have a raging love affection for the Ginger Ninja Matt Rowell, I cannot brag about The Gold Coast Suns, who have still yet to play finals footy in the AFL. Meanwhile, the Gold Coast United left the A-League almost a decade ago.
Then of course, there have been numerous failed Rugby League ventures on the Goldie – RIP to the Chargers, Giants and Seagulls.
No code has yet figured out the impossible algorithm of how to produce a strong sporting franchise on the GC, and perhaps this is because mediocre players has been a common variable throughout.
Let’s now look back on some of the finest mediocre athletes to come out of the Gold Coast, courtesy of the Titans.
Mitch Rein (2018-) – 43 Games, 4 Tries
In a change of pace, I’m going to start this list with a player that still finds themselves on an NRL club’s books.
I usually try and cheekily slide a current player in the middle somewhere, but this time I just could not help myself.
Now Justin Holbrook has done a remarkable job on the Gold Coast in 2020, and is a worthy Coach of The Year in my book………but FOR F**K SAKES CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TEACH MITCH REIN TO THROW THE BALL BACKWARDS!!!!!
When you’re a dummy half and don’t want to be a complete waste of space, all you need to do is pass the ball backwards. Yet somehow, the former Dragon and Panther seemed to throw it forward at least half the time I watched Titans games this season. It simply defied belief.
I can’t believe that just a few years ago, I was advocating for his spot in the NSW Blues side
OK, rant over.
Matt Srama (2011-2016) – 65 Games, 7 Tries
We started with a hooker, and we’ve got another one. Matt Srama is now the man in focus.
The diminutive Number 9 was a handy little player during his time, always game to put his body on the line for his fellow footballers of mediocrity, and the few fans in attendance at home games.
Perhaps the most peculiar thing to come out of my research on Srama, was that after the 2014 NRL Season he signed a deal with the Sydney Roosters, yet backflipped to remain a Titan because of *insert airquotes* money issues.
That’s something you don’t see every day.
Did You Know: In 2012 Matt Srama represented the Philippines, in an 86-0 victory over Thailand to win the inaugural Rugby League Asian Cup Championship?
Dan Sarginson (2017) – 6 Games
The next cab off the rank, in terms of English Super League imports who failed miserably down under, is Dan Sarginson.
As fans of the NRL, we have come to learn that if you want to come over from England and make an impact in our competition, then you’d better do it fast.
Unfortunately for Sarginson, he was the new kid on the block in 2017, but he just did not have the right stuff.
Prior to his arrival on the Gold Coast, he played for his country 3 times between 2014 and 2016. He’s since yet to represent England again.